That is to say, I’m approaching my desired retirement age of 25 in a couple of months, but seeing as I’m a few dollars shy of my $6 billion savings goal, I’ll just retire for the weekend and catch up on some great reads from across the personal finance internet-o-sphere.

1. Lazy Man and Money, who also has an eye on retirement, begs the government to tie Roth IRA contribution limits to regional costs of living. This would be great for us in D.C. where an apple costs $12 (a.k.a. six cents Canadian).
2. Poor Poorer Than You. Living a frugal life is taking its toll on her. She could just do what one of my co-workers does to live a happy frugal life: drink herself silly by lunchtime so she’s too smashed to eat lunch and dinner. Money savings galore!
3. This weekly roundup is in memory of Clever Dude’s ability to see his feet while standing up.
4. Financial Dominance is a negotiating machine. Somehow he even negotiated five bucks out of me for the privilege of linking to his article.
5. If your 401(k) plan sucks, here are some tactics for dealing with it courtesy of Advanced Personal Finance. Bonus tip: if your 401(k) consists of a tissue box someone put in the office break room with “401(k)” magic-markered on it, you might want to go with a Roth IRA instead.
6. Money, Matter, and More Musings has some wild financial fantasies. As for me, I already fulfilled my crazy financial fantasy by going to Vegas and winning a million bucks from a rich Texas oilman at Blackjack. Unfortunately it was shortly followed by my worst financial nightmare of losing a million bucks to a five-year-old girl at Candy Land.
7. Moving will increase the quality of life for the My Two Dollars family. Another great way to improve your quality of life: stop eating thumbtacks.
8. Cash Money Life exposes the hidden costs of cruising the high seas. Another hidden cost: shipboard prostitutes run five times as much as their landlubber counterparts.
9. And finally, The Digerati Life suggests you tear down your fences so you and your neighbors can benefit from larger yards. I would do this myself, but one of my neighbors is really fond of wandering the backyard naked.

Have a great weekend! Don’t forget that next week we’re starting a 135-part series on ways to amuse yourself while in line at the grocery store. (You’ll really enjoy Part 72 entitled “Flirt Your Way to Grocery Discounts by Hitting on the Cashier.”)