The previous Punny Poll asked when you would file your Federal income tax return this year. Over 40% of you said by the end of February, but we all know you’re not going to. Another 16% said they would have them in by the end of March, meaning April 15th. Nearly 5% said they would never file their taxes for this year, and the alarming part is that all of the people who checked that answer had U.S. IP addresses in the survey logs. Thanks for being jerks and not paying your taxes, jerks. For everyone else, your donations to the Help Keep America #1 or At Least #2 or #3 Fund are greatly appreciated.

A recent economic forecast that you won’t find at this link indicates that the price of regular unleaded gas could hit $4 a gallon on average in the U.S. this summer. What does this mean for you? Well, in short, anything that costs money will become much more expensive, such as booze and hookers as well as fruits and vegetables, unless those booze and vegetables use public transportation which they probably do not.

While some of you may be inclined to believe this report which predicts $4 gasoline by Memorial Day because it is written by experts in economic analysis, I think a much more accurate way of determining the day we hit $4 gas is by asking you, the readers of Punny Money who will just click the stupidest survey answer—because that’s the American way!

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